Thanks to a friend’s suggestion, we decided to challenge ourselves to try and identify the confident people that stand out in a crowd (we do this on the subway train, during Rush Hour). We also noticed how people carry themselves and whether their positive self-image was naturally implied. In the end, we can draw a simple answer that yes, confident people look more put together because of the way they treat themselves, and this is what we think makes a person look “powerful” and not what he does.
Naturally, we had to ask (only) three questions which in our opinion are important to consider when talking about self-image and its co-existence as part character traits.
- Why does it concern us to have a positive image of ourselves?
Positive self-image leads to more confidence. More confidence makes us stand tall and proud to be who we are. We need to accept a positive attitude towards ourselves because this is the only weapon used to duel self-doubt whenever it comes.
We rely on the media as much as we rely on our mirrors, and this is a good thing when we’re looking for an inspiration. It’s okay to identify with, but not to be identical to our idols. And here is why: those that we want to be inspired by are not us. Their opinions and lifestyle are relative to them and their story. Simply said, we all are authors to our unique biography, and should focus on making a masterpiece and inspire others. Now don’t get us wrong, it’s okay to follow trends: we do when it comes to all things beautiful, but we select the ones that we LOVE.
- How does the positive self-image affect our social skills?
We all have a certain set of beliefs when it comes to our self-worth (I’m good vs. I’m bad), as well as how effective we are as part of society (I can vs. I can’t). Adopting a positive self-image cancels out the negative experiences (such as bad situations, angry people). When we focus on improving our well-being, we become immune to negative thoughts and comments. It’s the happy-go-lucky attitude that helps us in difficult situations. Just think of a moment in your past when you aced that exam, or job interview: you went in ready to face the challenge and came out a winner. And it’s all thanks to your confidence. It is nice to note the other benefits when we become more self-confident: we’re more approachable and more people would love to talk to us; we become more considerate to others; we become kind and polite, therefore we easily impress others. We believe that confidence is what makes people more accepting and patient to others, because we know that becoming who we are is a process (however long). In the great words of Confucius “it does not matter how slowly we go, as long as we do not stop”.
- What can we do to switch from being self-conscious to self-confident?
It is a process, and there is no quick-fix button. All things have to begin with confronting the problem, work out possible solutions or approaches that can help along the way, and it is something we need to take care on our own (and in our own time). One advice we want to share is to face the fear, take a leap of faith, and expect great things to happen (although it seems cliche, it worked for us).
We would also love to share the (growing) list of tricks that we have collected over the years, and have been using to take us one step closer to that “ideal” person. We also included a template that we use when we need to list the things we need to “tune up” and enjoy the improvements.
Be happy, be beautiful.