Tips and tricks to help (re)build ourselves

Let this be a dynamic list that keeps growing. Feel free to add your own wise words; we’d love to know what gets you going.

  1. Lend a helping hand: even the smallest of help (like holding the door for strangers) makes us feel more positive about our self-being only because we did something meaningful and made someone smile at us (if their ducks are in the right row).
  2. Lend a smile to improve your mood. In the eyes of other people you instantly become the go-to person they can rely on. There is one young lady we go to when we shop at our local bulk store. She’s always met us with a smile and an upbeat attitude, so naturally she became the person we make sure we go to each time to fully enjoy our experience in the store.
  3. Quiet your thoughts (or the internal argument inside your head): a trick that we use is to focus on listening to you taking deep breaths, nothing else. Just like in yoga, this mental clarity enables us to filter and prioritize the important thoughts from the garbled messages (we could possibly get when an insecurity creeps in).
  4. Make a list with goals and achievements that you would like to reach. BUT assign the number 1 spot to yourself. This way, when you’re in a position to question your behavior or a flood of thoughts, think about the most important thing on your list and how you are improving it.
  5. Every time you’re about to criticize yourself or let a negative thought take over your immediate attention, ask yourself: “Do I need this right now”? Don’t worry, you will be able to address the issue if you need to, and decrease the number of irrelevant questions that might stress you out.
  6. Understand what you want and don’t give up on that: it gets easier if you just zoom in on the goal and not on the pitfalls on your way there.
  7. Find solutions to an outstanding problem or issue: consider a problem to be a question instead, and try to find as many answers to it. Thinking on your feet can make you feel more confident, mainly because there is no right answer (you can’t be wrong) so no matter what, you come out as the winner in the situation.
  8. Accept yourself: faults and all. You are magnificent the way you are, despite of what the tiny little voice is saying to you. We are the only species on this planet that have the ability to make a conscious decision and change our future.
  9. Make a list of things you think are in a need for a tune-up. Then, work your way down the list and make sure that when you think you’ve found its solution cross it off. Very important tip: LEAVE THE PAST IN THE PAST. If you’ve seen Disney’s Incredibles you might’ve heard Edna Mode saying: “I never look back darling, it distracts from the now” (we are using it as one of the daily mantras). Time travel is still not possible, so we can’t change our past. Until the news announce otherwise, leave out the woulda shoulda coulda attitude. Improvement only becomes productive when we swap a bad trait with a good one right then and there.
  10. Surround yourself with positive people. They will help you through the toughest of times and you will again feel the strength and confidence to move mountains. Because that’s what you need: someone to pick you up and push you forward.
  11. A study from Queen’s University suggests that in order for us to improve the way we walk, we need to change our train of thoughts. Because we’re always trying to improve our well-being, we decided to assign ourselves a little homework: at a certain hour of the day we dedicate 5 minutes thinking only of positive words, and walk (either around the house, or outside). And this has made us walking a little bit taller and with a pronounced confidence.
  12. Don’t gossip and don’t listen to “idle village” gossip. It’s not productive, it’s not healthy, and (quite frankly, whatever nonsense you’ve heard about you or someone you know) probably not true. Unless you own a tabloid and make oodles of money out of these “stories”, why bother.

 

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